Same Love vs. Era Differente

Thanks to everyone who has been following along this little project this month. With yesterday's post we hit just under 600 unique visitors and just over 1,000 views over just the weekend. I sincerely didn't expect to have that level of attentiveness from folks. It's been pretty neat to read messages many of you have sent in. There's lots of love out there and I am grateful to have the privilege of being able to share out. As I've mentioned to some, me coming out is not a new thing as I came out years ago. I am just sharing that journey to folks in quite frankly a public way. I do this to hopefully bring to the public consciousness among my circle of friends and family the need to be sensitive, open, and loving to all people to make this journey easier for others who come after us. 

So thank you again for following along. :)

While yesterday I shared the story of coming out to my brother Eddie, I wanted to slow things down a bit today and go back to some music that sustained me after sharing who I was with Eddie. 

At this point I am in graduate school in Wisconsin. I was living the summer in a very small town of 15,000 or so when school was in session. As you might imagine, that was hella small for me. I had always giggled that I thought Dubuque was small, but River Falls would end up taking the cake for smallest town I've ever and will ever live in. Being in a small town definitely taught me a lot about myself and am grateful for that experience but let's just say that I likely won't be returning anytime to live there permanently. 

Being in a small town there were events that simply didn't interest me. I had to rely on myself to really entertainment myself some weekends. Netflix and a music subscription is all I needed apparently. I've mentioned Macklemore and Ryan Lewis' "Same Love" several times throughout my previous posts and that song continues to be a tune I enjoy and brings back a rush of emotions that I was feeling in graduate school. There is a particular version that definitely cues the water works for me. It was Mackelmore and Ryan Lewis, Mary Lambert, Madonna, and Trombone Shorty's performance of "Same Love" and "Open Your Heart" in the 2014 Grammys. This performance was again building up to the eventual legalization of same-sex marraige so it carried lots of weight. Seeing Queen Latifah come out to officiate the wedding ceremony and Madonna come out to sing "Open Your Heart" literally had my heart full. I felt at that moment that we were indeed getting closer to see marraige for all people become reality. Seeing couples, both gay and straight, be married that night was inspiring and will always be one of my favorite performances of it. 

"Same Love" was not the only song I overplayed during my graduate years. I would be pleasantly surprised when one of my favorite Mexican Norteno groups would release a song speaking to a queer experience. This song began building a bridge for me that again pushed me further and further to believe that my eventual coming out to my parents would be ok, if not right away, eventually. 

For those who know me are probably aware that I am a big fan of Los Tigres del Norte. For my non-Latino or non-Mexican friends this an internationally known group for thier music and messaging. You'll find that many Latinos are fans, and if not, are at minimal aware of the music they make. The group often tells stories in thier music which can range from the dangers of drug and alcohol use, immigration, migrant worker rights, the split identity of being a U.S. Citizen with a Mexican heritage, etc. You'll see in places like Chicago that they have streets named after them in neighborhoods like La Vilita. 

In 2014, Los Tigres released the track "Era Differente" as part of the album "Realidades" In this track, the first of its kind by a group such as theirs, released a song that spoke to a woman's experience of not liking men but instead liking women. This broke a major barrier in the genre of music due to how heteronormative the VAST majority of Norteno music is. When interviewed about the song, the group would speak to how they felt it was a thank you gift to thier LGBTQIA+ fans for always showing up and enjoying their music. They felt that the queer story was a story that wasn't being told and needed to be told. They would go on and be recognized by GlAAD for thier effort. You can read all about the lyrical content and recognition with this link: 

​https://www.glaad.org/blog/regional-superstars-los-tigres-del-norte-pen-song-about-same-sex-love

Admittedly this was a song that I was able to play when I was home. Everyone in the family was a fan of Los Tigres. My parents knew thier music, danced to thier music, and really followed them throughout thier lives. This was an opportunity for me to use something familiar to everyone in the family, to begin to normalize the idea of someone liking another person of the same-sex. Whether or not my family knew it at the time, I played this song because I loved it and the music was great, but in many ways I was coming out to them passively by playing this song any moment I could get. This song was yet another sign to me, that indeed I could be out with my family. This song was another song I cried myself asleep to. This song will ultimately be a song that I would hear my mom say is one of her favorites. Los Tigres were already one of my faves prior to this song, but knowing they came out with this tune definitely made me fall in love with them even further. By releasing a song like "Era Differente" was a brief of fresh air and an opportunity for others like me to begin sharing our open lives with those who might be older and unfamiliar with same-sex relationships.